These days I feel depression. It happens here and there. Suddenly my mood drops. From one day to the next. Being fine one day I wake up the following morning and feel depressed. It’s weird. Because my situation hasn’t really changed. I still get up to write. I get up to take care of my cat. I get up to do some laundry. I get up to do some light cleaning. I get up to do grocery shopping. But my mood is different.

I have lost purpose. I look for meaning. Have too many days been too similar? I do not care for routine. In fact, I get bored very easily. The weather has been the same for weeks: hot, dry and extremely predictable. Sounds nice. Yes, I know. California sunshine. But too hot to be outside in the afternoon. It’s like an oven. And frankly, it’s too much of a good thing.

I like variety. I thrive with difference. The best part of attending UC Berkeley was to walk around campus, listening to the many different languages and looking at the many different faces. Loved it. I crave variety. The absolute opposite of routine. One of the reasons I have a hard time with a 9-5 job. I don’t want to know what will happen every day. I invite surprise and wonder.

To lift myself out of my depression I listen to Blues! Love it. And isn’t that funny? That my bluesy mood needs blues? Well, it works.


  1. Indeed, the blues have been dragging folks back from the brink for decades. And I know what you mean about the unrelenting sunshine and oppressively hot weather: it has the same effect on me. Time for a vacation in the Olympic rainforest, maybe.

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